May 13

Today

Today is a day of gathering together the strands of this other life. I must remember the rich context here of friends and neighbors; bodies with misplaced names, but histories like dreams that I can only dimly remember. They will come back as I slowly merge with this reality here… this life now. I can feel the intimate presence of that other life becoming dioramic, and it will slowly recede into memory and take on its own dreamlike quality. A good dream. A very good dream filled with divine spirits incarnated as the friends who I have shared so much with over these last four months.

Today is a day of remembering and savoring the taste of that life for the few moments before it too fades. It was too powerful this time. Overwhelming, like an undertow pulling me into deep, deep waters called Caring and Sadness, under the blazing noon of Love and Affection. I wish to savor this meal and learn from it. You are what you eat and this feast had many courses.

Today is a day to celebrate these events because mixed in generously with the sadness of destroyed dreams is the realization – shared this time – that together we can weave new dreams. Reality is only a shared dream after all.

Having companions to share dreams with makes all the difference – makes it real. Thoughts and feelings follow the ebb and flow of the tides of our lives and too often we are anchored at one place in the flow, swaying one way with the ebbing tide, another way with the flood. To up anchor and voyage to a new vantage point upon ourselves brings the old anchorage into sharper relief. No longer swaying back and forth to the rhythm of that spot, one finds the solidity of the contours of the prior horizon and knows better one’s place in it all. To look upon a new horizon makes all the difference in the old one.

Today is a day to remember the blessings of sacraments shared. To acknowledge what we should realize all the time; time we are too pressed to savor. The divinity we seek is here; the heaven scanned for above is only a phantom of this heaven here, lost amidst our inattention; saints revered stand all around us and salvation can be found in a shared smile, a gentle touch, an acknowledged presence. I see all of you and I am glad of it.

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